Growing up, I didn’t have a lot of “things”, so what I did have mattered—including my plastic doll named Sharon. The first time she started falling apart, my Dad put her back together with electrical tape. Over the next couple of years, she required quite a bit of that black tape. Did I think that made Sharon […]
Author Archives: Kay Malloy McLane
Seven years ago, I was encouraged by my dear friend, Betsy, to join a Habitat For Humanity, “Women Build” committee. Our group was brainstorming fund-raising ideas and Annie, a member of our team (and now a close friend), came up with the concept for “She Nailed It!”—an all women, relay nail-hammering competition, that not only […]
Phenomenon—a fact or circumstance that’s observed, but sometimes difficult to explain or even understand. It’s about consciousness and what we experience and how that affects us. What we “feel” exists because we’re experiencing it. Psychological Phenomena refers to mental processes, like: • The Placebo Effect—if a patient believes that he’s taking something that’s supposed to heal him (even […]
Stop in the Name of Love” was a song performed by The Supremes in 1965. Some of the lyrics are: “stop in the name of love, before you break my heart, think it over.” “Stop” and “think it over” are what I want to talk about today. Many of us don’t slow down, let alone […]
Have you ever felt overwhelmed, defeated or exhausted because, in spite of how hard you love, work or “put yourself out there” it doesn’t seem to be enough? Have you ever stood at the door of hopelessness, believing that if you take one more step you could “walk off the edge?” I’ve felt that way. […]
Scenario 1: You’ve had a really stressful day: You worked overtime (or over-volunteered), got drenched in a downpour running into the grocery store for dinner because everyone’s screaming,” what’s for dinner?” and, when you finally get home, walk into a house that’s a mess, disorganized, in disrepair and just plain sad. You think, “what the heck am I […]
On Saturday, as my daughter was driving home, she saw a small, older woman standing on a street corner holding a sign saying, “I need help. Can you spare any money?” She drove past, stopped at the traffic light, then went back. She gave the woman the $20 she had in her wallet. The woman […]
Five Really Short Stories 1. While I waited for a friend, I sat at a tiny bistro table, with a cup of cinnamon-plum tea. Two women sitting close to me were talking. One of them said to the other, “you really have a servant heart.” It was expressed so simply. She didn’t say, “you give so […]
Have you ever spontaneously boarded a shiny railroad car (encouraged by people yelling “come on, join us, it’s going to be fun!”), thinking, “this will be a great adventure” only to learn, too late, that the final destination isn’t anywhere near where you thought you’d end up? When that happens, you have choices: 1. jump off at […]
DESOLATION she tries to ignore it, but the desolation demands attention. it won’t let her wander outside its constrictive boundaries; to simply be. it taunts her, saying, “you’ve failed in so many ways”, “do you know how often you’ve screwed up?”, “listen to me tell you about your weaknesses, your shortcomings, your pain”, “let me […]
Singing As the sun rose, I sat facing the garden. The trunk of the majestic locust tree was on the right, the branches of the stately pines, heavy with newly fallen snow were on the left. Nature was singing. I felt small—not only physically. I felt my incorporeal smallness. I thought about an evening when […]
THE PENDULUM hurrier and hurrier i run, racing through daylight, before twilight dances on our earth the pendulum swings… i used to try to give the right answers now i remember to ask the right questions fueled by the knowledge that the light will fade, that the dark will come, that my days will be […]
During a flight to Florida, I sat between two women. The one on my left was 77 years old. She and her husband were traveling from Quebec. She asked to borrow my wrap because she was cold (she also had her right arm pretty much on my lap the entire time) and she told me about her […]
Clouds are amazing, but we often miss them, caught up in our fast-paced (often frenzied) lives. We see only what’s right in front of us—myopia blocking out all else. Last week, I was driving down the road and just had to pull into the parking lot of “closed for the season” ice cream parlor because […]
CANDLELIGHT I light the candles as dusk envelopes the space. I don’t like the dark. I see things in the shadows that I don’t see in the light. I hear things that are silenced in the day. I’m afraid of the dark. Fear can freeze us in place; it can bring us to our knees […]
When I think of courage, the first thing that comes to mind is bravery—military personnel in war zones protecting our freedom; firefighters running into burning buildings carrying out those who are trapped; donors giving a kidney or bone marrow to someone they’ve never met; teenagers standing up to bullies who, once again, are going to terrorize […]
What if you fill your cup of life? Not overfill it with boring or uninspiring activities or meaningless possessions. (Do you ever fill your life with tangible stuff to drown out the lack of real stuff?) Not overload it with placeholders that scream “my cup’s full!”. But, rather, fill it to the brim with the wholeness of […]
The first “drive-thru” was at a St. Louis bank in 1930, and since that time we do a lot more than make deposits without ever leaving our cars. We can “drive-thru” to buy postage, meals, and coffee; to drop off books, dry cleaning, and movies; to get a flu shot or, even, to get married. […]
Core Beliefs reflect the essence of self—what we consider absolute truths about ourselves, others and the world. (They’re very different from “on the surface” thoughts that change depending on what’s going on in your life.) Life/World Core Beliefs sound like: the world is a dangerous place (-) honesty is always best (+) people are fundamentally self-serving […]
I’ve mentioned vestibular neuritis before, but what’s interesting is that as I live with this condition, that isn’t life-threatening but is lifestyle-threatening, I think about how blessed I am to have this as my most serious physical disadvantage. Vestibular Neuritis Information about motion, equilibrium, and spatial orientation is provided by the vestibular system which detects gravity […]
This isn’t a “happy” story about lasagna, green sweaters or cloth napkins. It’s a story about humanness and brokenness. I’m not talking about broken hearts but, rather, broken spirits— when you know you have worth, but can’t count it, when it feels like life has been sucked out of you, when you’ve lost, given up, or […]
Like every year, the week before Christmas was a whirlwind of activity. Before the 25th, there were presents to still be wrapped (not part of my typical reality since I like having things done ahead of time), groceries to be bought, a table for sixteen to be set, music selections to be chosen (yep, just a […]
imminent—forthcoming, impending behavior—the manner of conducting ourselves Imminent Behavior—how you’re going to respond, in the time immediately in front of you. It’s different from future thinking that sounds like: “Next year (month, week) I’m going to do things like: be kinder (find God, give back)”, or “When I have the right job (relationship, home) then, I’ll become happy”. In […]
Have you ever set your sight on a very specific destination—a job, a relationship, a lifestyle, an adventure—and never arrived there at all, or got there in an obscure, circuitous way? • How did that make you feel? In your attempt to reach that destination were there times when you found yourself “off the beaten path” […]
This post was originally published in 2014. I had it on my calendar to post again today (8 days before Christmas 2018) and coincidentally (or not, since things like this happen all the time), it was the topic at church yesterday. It’s eight days before Christmas! Emails regarding last-minute presents flood our inboxes. Anyone we’ve […]