Tapping Into The Essence of Self

A while ago, I was at a seminar with a group of women I didn’t know. One of them immigrated to The United States several years earlier. She said that her “English isn’t good enough“, and that she feels “defeated and less than”. She wasn’t finding other women who wanted to build a relationship with […]

Going Home

Today, I want to tell you a story about a little girl who was born in Wales, Great Britain in the 1930s. She lived with her family in a thatch-roofed cottage on a rocky shoreline, where they had a very simple life—moving through each day the same as the one before. There were seven children and […]

A Little Silver Ring

Many years ago I had the wonderful privilege of being with people who are—on the surface only of course—different from me. I was in La Entrada, Honduras on a mission trip with others from my faith community. It was a time that was rich with emotion and learning. In spite of speaking mostly through an […]

The Loneliness Epidemic

Feeling Alone Last week my daughter Erin—a clinical trials & research nurse—sent me a very dismal report about loneliness. Then, I stumbled upon a piece on the same subject while researching something else. And, in the past few weeks, I’ve talked to at least four people about loneliness. When there’s a recurring theme, it’s a […]

Givers and Takers

When I was in my late twenties, the man I worked for said something that has stayed with me all these decades: “In this world, there are givers and takers. My wife is a giver, I am a taker and you, Kay, are a giver.” I remember feeling proud of that title. It felt like […]

Patience My Dear Child

Many of us run through life, like a child in a proverbial candy store—grabbing this and that experience, not really tasting all the “flavors”—simply consuming life. When we’re racing through experiences, we aren’t fully participating in them. We’re simply snapping screen shots as we jump from one thing to another. Because there’s so much going […]

Personal Freedom & Declaring Independence

I woke up this morning acutely aware of the amazing freedom and abundance I have. I could choose to lie in my bed as long as I want on this work-free morning, get up and brush my teeth with clean water running through a faucet in one of my bathrooms (while in a third of our […]

Seeking Wholeness

wholeness—complete and harmonious unity; a synergy of body, mind and spirit How often do you actually experience a sense of wholeness? Or, is that never part of your reality because you feel like a piece of you is missing—that you aren’t able to complete the puzzle because you’re somehow incomplete? The concept of “feeling whole” won’t […]

The Pressure Washer, The Deck and The Tree

Whenever I wasn’t with clients yesterday, I was outside pressure washing our deck.  This is an annual ritual—one that’s made even more necessary because of my beloved locust tree (“The Tree”). The Tree is very messy. Each spring, seedpods fall creating a lot of residual muck to get rid of. But, in spite of the […]

Grace & Privileged Lives

Grace One morning, without even “trying”, I found myself in a place of grace. The feeling was palpable although nothing looked different. It was experienced rather than seen. (Sometimes, we humans don’t believe something’s real unless we can see it and touch it.) At first, this incipient energy created only a subtle shift in the […]

Editor of Life

Editing—a fundamentally necessary process to get to the heart of the matter; to revise or expunge or correct When you watch a movie or read a book—or a post like this—it’s likely been edited. Without editing, there may be typos, grammar issues, inconsistencies, and the absence of a through-line (the common thread that ties it […]

Finding Grace and Peace in Giving Up

There are lines (sometimes very fine) between embracing fully, accepting, settling and giving up.   Today, let’s talk about giving up. It’s easy to imagine abandoning hope when you: feel scared or vulnerable, hide in the shadows, don’t have the support of those who are “supposed” to love you, are victimized or minimized or give […]

Love Letters

In early 2016, I wrote a letter to my then ten-year-old granddaughter with ten specific thoughts. It was a spur-of-the-moment sharing, hand-written on simple lined “school” paper with holes in the margin, around which I drew little flowers. She asked me to hang onto it for her and I took it out, and reread it, […]

Label Maker

Good Morning Beautiful Friend. How are you my Precious Daughter? You are so Creative! You’re a Worthless Loser. You are such a Clumsy Jerk! How can you be so Stupid and Ugly? You did a Wonderful job! How can you always be so Generous? You’re a Valuable team member. You were an unwanted Mistake. Why are you so Useless? Get lost you Freak! Your […]

Dreams & Rules & New Life

Part 1 I woke up this, first day of spring, morning from a bad dream. Thankfully it wasn’t a full-blown nightmare—I have those too. This dream was about being in a terrible accident and waking up paralyzed; my mobility forever at the mercy of a wheelchair; my way of life abruptly halted. In the dream, I was frantic, […]

Life Prioritization

Priority definition: that one thing which takes precedence over all else; what we give foremost, and special, attention to. We’ve lost the idea of having a priority in life. Even the plural— priorities—refers to two to four things, not the dozen (or hundred) we have on our “this is what I must do” lists. If you […]

Yesterday’s Tomorrows

“Tomorrow […] comes into us at midnight very clean. It’s perfect when it arrives and puts itself in our hands. It hopes we learned something from yesterday.” Marion Robert Morrison (John Wayne)   “Tomorrow, I’ll take better care of myself.” “Tomorrow, I’ll make smarter choices.” “Tomorrow, I’ll get enough sleep.” “Tomorrow, I’ll pursue healthier relationships.” “Tomorrow, I’ll […]

Letting It Be

How often do we give ourselves permission to “be”— to walk past the “to do” list, to ignore the insistent demands of technology, to take the time to be fully with others, or ourselves or God, to be okay, to simply be? One day, when I had no scheduled client appointments, I chose to let the […]

Premeditated Kindness

We often have a myopic view of the world, which limits us from “seeing” outside our own—frequently very limited—life. This narrow perspective leads to behavior that can be anything from inconsiderate to downright mean. We get so caught up in our reality that we don’t “see” how we sometimes behave. I truly believe that “nice” is underrated. I also believe […]

Socks & Peace & 28°

awareness As I back the car out of the garage, the thermometer moves down to 28°. I’m aware that as winter progresses I adapt to the cold. What would have been shocking in the middle of July is now simply part of the ebb and flow of the season. I get used to it. It […]