On the Teller Line

A woman, standing in a checkout line on the Friday after Thanksgiving, is mumbling about how “ridiculous these lines are”. By the time she gets to the register, she’s yelling at the (likely) minimum wage person moving as quickly as he can. The young man stops (just for a moment) and tries to regroup. He […]

Arlene, Nkosi and Intention

On Friday, I went to the funeral of Arlene—a woman I never had the pleasure of personally meeting in this life, but knew of because of my friend: her daughter, Carol. I’ve been to many viewings and funerals, but this one was filled with more joy than almost any I’ve experienced. (Another one was for […]

Brass Doorknobs and Being Small

The doorknob—that the little girl was noticing for the first time—was brass. She was far too young to realize that she would, one day, think of that as her earliest memory. It wouldn’t be like the memories backlit by aged photographs, or the ones told, and retold, for decades. No, this one would be hers […]

Limiting Beliefs

A boy drops a glass of water and his mother yells, “You are always so clumsy!” The husband works for hours, on a special dinner for his wife, and the response is, “I don’t know why you even bother cooking.” The little girl hears, “I just gave you a rosary last week. How could you […]

Life-Giving Nature

The sun has just set and it’s that “ in between” time—not bright and not completely dark. I sit on a rocking chair, alone on the front porch. As I listen to the wind come up the mountain, I begin to study the different trees and shrubs around me. They each remind me of people […]

Serendipitous Journeys

I came away from a Women’s Retreat weekend with a renewed awareness of how different our individual journeys are, in spite of what often seems like a lot of sameness. In day-to-day life we, sometimes, just “go through the motions”. Our routines take us from point A—the time we get up, until point Z—when we […]

Change Agent

I woke up around 5am, made my tea, and went outside to write by candlelight. At 6:40 a rooster began crowing, then as the low, somewhat mournful, sound of the train whistle bellowed down in The Valley, a full choir of birds joined their voices in “The Song of The Morning”. Through the branches of the […]

Fearless & Weary (and shining a light?)

A few weeks ago, I used this word to define how I was feeling: weary. I have never (at least as far as I can remember) ever used that word to describe myself before. Weary feels sad to me. It feels defeated. It feels worn out. After a couple of weeks of significant prayer and […]

Tapping Into The Essence of Self

A while ago, I was at a seminar with a group of women I didn’t know. One of them immigrated to The United States several years earlier. She said that her “English isn’t good enough“, and that she feels “defeated and less than”. She wasn’t finding other women who wanted to build a relationship with […]

Going Home

Today, I want to tell you a story about a little girl who was born in Wales, Great Britain in the 1930s. She lived with her family in a thatch-roofed cottage on a rocky shoreline, where they had a very simple life—moving through each day the same as the one before. There were seven children and […]

A Little Silver Ring

Many years ago I had the wonderful privilege of being with people who are—on the surface only of course—different from me. I was in La Entrada, Honduras on a mission trip with others from my faith community. It was a time that was rich with emotion and learning. In spite of speaking mostly through an […]

The Loneliness Epidemic

Feeling Alone Last week my daughter Erin—a clinical trials & research nurse—sent me a very dismal report about loneliness. Then, I stumbled upon a piece on the same subject while researching something else. And, in the past few weeks, I’ve talked to at least four people about loneliness. When there’s a recurring theme, it’s a […]

Givers and Takers

When I was in my late twenties, the man I worked for said something that has stayed with me all these decades: “In this world, there are givers and takers. My wife is a giver, I am a taker and you, Kay, are a giver.” I remember feeling proud of that title. It felt like […]

Patience My Dear Child

Many of us run through life, like a child in a proverbial candy store—grabbing this and that experience, not really tasting all the “flavors”—simply consuming life. When we’re racing through experiences, we aren’t fully participating in them. We’re simply snapping screen shots as we jump from one thing to another. Because there’s so much going […]

Personal Freedom & Declaring Independence

I woke up this morning acutely aware of the amazing freedom and abundance I have. I could choose to lie in my bed as long as I want on this work-free morning, get up and brush my teeth with clean water running through a faucet in one of my bathrooms (while in a third of our […]

Seeking Wholeness

wholeness—complete and harmonious unity; a synergy of body, mind and spirit How often do you actually experience a sense of wholeness? Or, is that never part of your reality because you feel like a piece of you is missing—that you aren’t able to complete the puzzle because you’re somehow incomplete? The concept of “feeling whole” won’t […]

The Pressure Washer, The Deck and The Tree

Whenever I wasn’t with clients yesterday, I was outside pressure washing our deck.  This is an annual ritual—one that’s made even more necessary because of my beloved locust tree (“The Tree”). The Tree is very messy. Each spring, seedpods fall creating a lot of residual muck to get rid of. But, in spite of the […]

Grace & Privileged Lives

Grace One morning, without even “trying”, I found myself in a place of grace. The feeling was palpable although nothing looked different. It was experienced rather than seen. (Sometimes, we humans don’t believe something’s real unless we can see it and touch it.) At first, this incipient energy created only a subtle shift in the […]

Editor of Life

Editing—a fundamentally necessary process to get to the heart of the matter; to revise or expunge or correct When you watch a movie or read a book—or a post like this—it’s likely been edited. Without editing, there may be typos, grammar issues, inconsistencies, and the absence of a through-line (the common thread that ties it […]

Finding Grace and Peace in Giving Up

There are lines (sometimes very fine) between embracing fully, accepting, settling and giving up.   Today, let’s talk about giving up. It’s easy to imagine abandoning hope when you: feel scared or vulnerable, hide in the shadows, don’t have the support of those who are “supposed” to love you, are victimized or minimized or give […]