There are times in life when you’re “on the same page” as another person, seeming to grow together in tandem. Maybe, your relationship blossomed from acquaintance to dear friend, or from friendship to significant partner. Perhaps, you met someone and instantly knew you were kindred spirits. (How wonderful is that type of synchronicity?)

For many, however, the path to meaningful relationships isn’t easy. If you’ve experienced heartbreak, a challenging childhood, or had your feelings hurt often, you may always be tentative about allowing yourself to be close to anyone; to trust that it’s worth giving it another chance. Maybe you were bullied in high school, brutalized at a job, or mentally beaten up so often that you just don’t think you have the strength to try once more—to cross another bridge—so you shut down and stay where you are. Sadly, life experiences make many humans reluctant to leap at offers of friendship or love, even though they so desire that connection.

Have you ever experienced crossing a proverbial bridge, making a proclamation of love—or just sharing your story—assuming the other person wanted to connect only to find out that the individual on the other side didn’t feel the same way you did? If that happens, you might be hesitant to try again, believing, “if I make an overture, but he or she doesn’t, then I’ll look, and feel, foolish.” You think, “what happens if I cross the bridge again and get shut down again?” You might reason that crossing the bridge first is risky and vulnerable.

But, whenever you hold onto the past, you block the chance for new “bridges” to come into your future. If you stop take chances, eventually, you’ll become “bridge-crossing averse.”

But, if you do take the chance and cross the wrong bridge or the wobbly bridge or the bridge that breaks and dumps you into the river, at least you weren’t sitting at home, paralyzed by fear, afraid to make a mistake. Successes follow failures.

Some people cross bridges for the wrong reasons, like believing they must have a “significant other” in their life, now, because they don’t know “how” to be alone. (Please don’t rush into a relationship for the wrong reasons. You deserve to be with a person who is right for you. And, figuring out how to be peace-filled with yourself helps you be “whole” when you choose to be in a relationship.)

Bridges are crossed not only into and out of relationships (although those trips often seem to carry more weight). Sometimes bridge-crossing involves a new way of life with a health change, a different (or end of a) career, the addition of a family member, a new place to live or, even a new way of looking at our world.

Some bridges are easier to cross than others.
Some bridges are rickety and, you feel like you’re taking a chance with each step.
Some bridges are sturdy, and you feel secure as you cross them.
Some bridges sway terribly with the wind, and you feel like you’ll get blown right off.
Some bridges are a leisurely stroll over a little pond.
Some bridges have weight limits, and you’re carrying so much stuff that you might just fall through.
Some bridges are solid and invite you to bring everything you want with you.
Some bridges are unbelievably long, and you feel like you’ll never get to the other side.
Some bridges are beautiful structures, and you take your time and enjoy the stroll.
Some bridges end in a forest, so dark that you can’t see what you’re walking into.
Some bridges end with sunshine and beautiful flowers.
Some bridges are dilapidated and may fall apart before you get to the other side.
Some bridges are shiny and new, and you want to be the first one to cross them.
Some bridges have murky, stormy, water beneath them.
Some bridges have beautiful, calm water singing to you.
Some bridges are very familiar because you’ve run back and forth over them dozens of times.
Some bridges are the ones you’ve admired for years but never made the time to cross.
Some bridges have no one on the other side, or worse, people who are saying “why the heck are you here?”
Some bridges have crowds of people happily waiting for you to get to the other side.

What bridges do you regret never having crossed, are avoiding, or need to go back the other way on?
What bridges have you crossed that have been mistakes, causing you nothing but pain?
What bridges have you crossed that have touched your spirit, brought you love, or showed you what’s best in your life?

Some bridges are really high, and the view is amazing.
Some bridges are really high and test your courage.
And, some bridges have a sign that says, “a new life is on the other side,” but you simply don’t believe you deserve it.

being brave – being scared
being guarded – being vulnerable
being human – making choices – crossing bridges

My prayer for you this week is that you cross bridges that bring you great happiness, joy, and, of course, peace.
Kay

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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