Many times, in order to live into our best selves, we have to start a change process—ridding ourselves of old habits that no longer serve us, traditions that bring us down instead of up, and memories that tell a story filled with woe.
But, that change, even though it’s necessary, can be work. It’s easy to fall into old habits like hearing the damaging voices that narrated our earlier lives—narrations that didn’t help us become who God knows us to be. Most of us can’t easily flip a switch and banish realities that added pain to our years or memories that are fraught with violence or minimization. We are products of our lives up to this point, but with enough work, we don’t have to spend the time we have left as victims of those years.
This is a simple example:
Let’s assume there’s a party that you heard (a lot) about, but didn’t receive an invitation to. Being excluded hurts and reminds you of the times you were left behind or rejected. You may not even know the reason why you weren’t on the guest list, but you create a story around it.
Your choices are to:
1) hang onto that pain and become distraught, hurling every insult you can at yourself for being “unwanted”
2) think about how awful the host of the party is and ruminate on that for a while
3) be upset but slowly let go of it
4) let go of it immediately, because you know you have value, or
5) think, “obviously the invite just didn’t get to me so I’ll call the host”
Which one do you choose?
That choice —whether positive, negative or somewhere in between—is a reaction predicated upon your experiences up to this point. If you can free yourself from the burdens of the past (easier said than done, of course), you open the door to move forward, being fully in the present.
Our lives are not solely determined by the things that happen to us. They are also shaped by our reactions to events and circumstances, and our attitudes, which influence every one of our days. Choosing to be a change agent in your own life by embracing a positive attitude, creates a chain reaction of (you know this) positivity.
Being a change agent is
the catalyst that ignites the spark,
that discovers the joy,
that spawns all kinds of extraordinary outcomes.
Sometimes, all we see when we look at ourselves are our scars (not the physical ones)—the reminders of the wounds we suffered, the trauma we experienced, the hell we lived through to get where we are. But, sometimes, our scars are beautiful. Like the lines in our faces, they tell the story of a life that’s been lived; not one that’s been put on a shelf; pristine and untouched.
These scars can be reminders of freedom, of perseverance, of faith in God, of faith in others and of faith in ourselves. These scars are the roadmaps of our lives. And we’re still here to tell those tales, in ways that mirror how God sees us—beautiful, valuable and loved.
Please help spread the word of peace full home® and invite your friends to our peace-filled conversations.