In January, many of us evaluate the past year and make resolutions—resolving to find a different way of living; to do something like lose weight, eat healthier or get organized (love this one), or not do something like smoke, overspend or procrastinate.
We forget, however, that each day is an opportunity to begin anew—a chance to begin to create different realities.
I’m fully aware that “each day we have the opportunity to begin anew” probably sounds like pure nonsense if you’re:
walking into a kitchen with too little food,
grieving the loss of someone you love,
heading out the door to a job you hate or
lonely (different from alone) and without hope.
It can seem impossible to get past hardships long enough to even imagine a new beginning, or think “wow,I get to create my reality today!” Having walked in the dark, I understand that.
I’ve been asked often, something like, “How am I supposed to ‘start fresh’ when my life is depressing and not resembling anything like what I dreamed it would be?”
Sometimes we have to go back to go forward.
What would you do differently if you had the chance? How would two decades, years, months or days ago look if you could “do it over”?
There have been periods when (with the luxury of time that has passed) I’ve thought: “I wish I would have done things differently.” Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten so upset, broken or hurt. Maybe I would have shared what was in my heart (or stayed silent). Maybe I would have remembered my goal to walk through life with joy and grace. But, in those moments and, my humanness, I reacted the only way I knew how.
Once we recognize where the “wheels of the life we dreamed of” fell off our carriages, we can make choices to stop re-running the same tape, but it’s work. We get stuck in what we’re accustomed to and, instead of being our own best allies, we’re often our own worst enemies.
Moving forward….you can, but will you
be gentle with yourself, forgive yourself, and show yourself the kindness you often reserve for others?
These are keys in starting to rebuild—in stepping back to step forward.
Algernon Sydney wrote, “God helps those who help themselves”. I never gave that saying much thought until a friend reframed it as “God helps those who ask for help.” That makes a lot more sense to me (and is more consistent with my understanding of God).
It’s often hard to ask for help though, isn’t it? Growing up, many of us were told (verbally or through loud and clear unspoken messages) that there are winners and losers; that it’s important to be strong, independent, self-sufficient; to win—even if the outcome doesn’t resonate with our truth.
Being vulnerable enough to ask for help is challenging for many of us. For me, it’s been on my “need to work on list” many times.
Every day, the first thing I say as I get out of bed is “Thank You, God.” Thank you for a new day, for another chance at a new beginning. I know it’s not a magic charm that will cure all of our problems and pain, but it’s one step forward, and in a New Year, that’s a great place to start.
May 2019 bring you joy, love blessings and a profound sense of peace.
©2019 peace full home®/intentional living
Please help spread the word of peace full home® and invite your friends to our peace-filled conversations. Thank You, Kay