Christmas Lights and Silent Nights

Yesterday, I sent two texts to my husband and daughters.
The first one said, “I have to cancel family dinner for tonight and next week. I need to catch up on work, clean, finish projects, shop, wrap (etcetera, etcetera, etcetera)”.
In the second one I wrote, “Made a mistake. Forgot what really matters. Will have dinner for whoever can be there. Love you all.” 

silent night, holy night


It’s a cold December, but not yet officially winter, morning. I take off my glasses and write with a pen propelled by all that’s going on in my mind, not even reading the words I commit to paper. It’s already 7:08, but it’s still dark. School openings are delayed for two hours because of ice. Everything is still. Everything is calm.

all is calm, all is bright


I’m aware that when holidays come around, the world becomes a dark place for some people. This time of year has a lot of folks feeling “less than” instead of “joy-full”. Long-ago pains come back to haunt those who’ve never experienced a “Hallmark movie” sort of Christmas season. Jettisoned into another time, the holidays becoming a reliving of hurt and abandonment—of unfulfilled dreams—of a storybook tale that never happened.

round yon virgin, mother and child


How often do we live in a mindless-consumption, less-than-aware, excessive kind of world? Christmas becomes about Santa Claus and spending and decorating and cramming in every possible “experience”. It often is not about peace and love and hope for a new world. We take on, put up with, and smile through, instead of be in.

holy infant so tender and mild


There’s a dichotomy between what the reason for the season is and the commercialization it often becomes. As the spirit moves in me I’m aware of the surroundings—the trappings of life—being pushed away. I get that my self-sufficiency is simply a guise. In truth, I am operating on God’s time.

sleep in heavenly peace


If we don’t stop and
and then be thankful for all we do have, it will be very challenging to…

sleep in heavenly peace


We cannot be more than we are. We cannot be perfect or all-knowing or superhuman.

silent night, holy night


Sometimes we’re like a string of Christmas lights that are a tangled up, chaotic mess because we rushed to put them away at the end of the last season. We’re unable to see the individual bulbs of brightness. So, when we try to pull the string of lights apart,
some of the bulbs go out,
or break.

Son of God, love’s pure light


I know that I just need to sit and be, but I fight it. I push back against that inner voice because “there’s so much more to do”.

radiant beams from Thy holy face


But, as the cacophony of noise settles down,
it becomes simply the background cadence to
the sound of life being lived out,
and breathed into,
as I’m wrapped in a cloak of newly-minted awareness.

with the dawn of redeeming grace


And I am profoundly moved, knowing that
as we rush, we are speeding through life.
We are racing to the end of Christmas.
Then, we pack it all up again, and put it away until next year.

Jesus Lord, at Thy birth


So, I will stop and send this off to you,
readers who I know and don’t know,
people who are fellow watchers
and wanderers
and welcomers
and possibility believers,
with my thanks for sharing this journey, of humanness, with me.

 img_5360Jesus Lord, at Thy birth.

Wishing you a blessed week,

©2016 peace full home™/intentional living


4 thoughts on “Christmas Lights and Silent Nights

  1. Thank you for writing this Kay. It is 10:30 pm,I am sitting at my favorite spot in my home, the soft light of the Christmas tree and the outside lights are wrapping me in warmth like a blanket .I was rushing through the day, putting lights outside , getting Christmas presents ( irritated how rude people can be, no smiles ), cleaning , thinking of all the things I still have to to do ………Our daughter and our son with his wife are coming home for Christmas.
    My husband went to bed and I needed some time to calm down. This is when I read your words. They made me think about my childhood, when Christmas was so different. It was a magical time. I was fortunate to have both Grandparents living with us. Back then I thought it was the norm, because I did not know it any different. Now I know, I was very lucky and I am so grateful. My Grandmother was a seamstress, so her room was off limits to us kids for the month of December. She was sewing clothes for our dolls out of fabric that she had sewn clothes for us. My sister and I knew that, but it was still such a suspense for us. Advent was a time of peace and quiet, we played games, we got together and told stories after a afternoon of being out in the snow playing , or almost freezing your toes sledding all afternoon with the neighbors kids. Or we did crafts likes making straw stars for the tree, or other ornaments. It took forever until Christmas, unlike now, rush, rush ….. I called my mom in Germany today, she is 89 years old and the sweetest and kindest person I know and I am so grateful that I still have her.It brought back a lot of those memories, but like I said earlier I was rushing through the day. Kay , your words brought it all back and I am so thankful for it. Remembering the real reason for Christmas, the birth of our Saviour Lord Jesus Christ. May you and your family have a peaceful and blessed Christmas .

    Liked by 1 person

    • Edith,

      Thank you for reaching out to me. I remember the Christmas you described. It was innocent and filled with anticipation—centered around the birth of Christ, as opposed to everything but that. When I was really young, my parents put the lights outside on the first Sunday of Advent and the tree up on Christmas Eve.

      It’s wonderful that the kids will be with you for Christmas! And, when you next talk to Mom, please let her know that I can imagine the wonderful person she must be, to have a daughter as sensitive and peace-filled as you.

      Blessings to you and your family Edith.

      Merry Christmas,


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s